By: Denny

From the mid to late 1960’s my parents owned and operated a shoe store and repair shop.  Mom generally took care of the sales while dad repaired shoes. It was a huge transition for our whole family as dad had previously been a truck driver. He wasn’t gone a lot because he drove locally, but now he was home all the time. We had moved from Cedar Rapids and relocated to Guttenberg. More shoes were made from leather back then, plus dad had a lot of leather stock in the repair shop. We lived above the store, and I still remember loving the smell of leather. Dad never had training in shoe repair except for some limited time spent with the guy they bought the business from, but he picked it up quickly. He did a lot of heels, soles, stitching, zippers, eyelets and whatever else could be done to a shoe. Occasionally a customer would buy a pair of shoes that didn’t quite fit so dad would custom stretch them. If a woman had a pair of shoes or high heels that she really liked but wanted the color changed, he could dye them to whatever color she wanted. Most shoes were made in America and could be repaired several times to extend their life. Nowadays these cheap Chinese shoes can’t be or aren’t worth repairing, so you just write them off, throw them out and buy a new pair. After about a year and a half we moved to Osage, shoe business included. There already was a shoe store and repair shop there. My parents worked hard to make a go of it, but the competition was well-established. To make ends meet dad took a job driving for a small local freight delivery company, which he soon owned. All five of us kids each helped as best we could. My older brother did a lot of the shoe repairs after school and on weekends, while I did the same working on the freight dock unloading and reloading trucks. Our youngest brother was born during this time and mom would take him to the store and had a bed set up for him in a small side room. If he started to cry while she was busy with a customer, another one might ask to pick him up and hold him. My three younger sisters helped in the same way taking care of him after school and on weekends along with the cooking and other household chores. Having a good work ethic and being accountable was part of our parents training us to become responsible adults.

We weren’t the perfect family, and mom and dad had their hands full keeping us in line making sure we all got along. We were taught to respect them and suffered the consequences for back talking. Telling our parents “No” would’ve been a regretful thing to do. Us kids were expected to settle our differences and arguments quickly or they would do it for us, and that wasn’t pretty. Sometimes they just stood back and let us have at it but intervened when it became physical. However, I remember one time my brother and I got into an argument and dad put the boxing gloves on us and we went at each other. Nothing like a good healthy fight. (LOL) I think both my parents’ flunked math because I never heard either of them count to three. Strange as it may sound, none of the rooms in our house had corners, at least that I became familiar with. Knowing my siblings, I don’t think any of us enjoy or seek conflicts as adults. On the other hand, we don’t run from them and know when to stand up for ourselves if found in the middle of one.

Romans 12:18 says, “If it is possible, as much as depends on you, live peaceably with all men.” Correct me if I’m wrong, but doesn’t peace usually come after a conflict? Not every conflict or disagreement has to escalate into a knock down drag out fight to be resolved and bring peace and reconciliation. “As much as depends on you” expresses the idea that there is only so much that can be done by you if the other party refuses to engage and do their part. Unfortunately, that’s the heart of why most conflicts never get resolved, because each side thinks the other should move first or owes them an apology before they will even come to the table. Where did the idea that we must avoid conflict at any cost come from? Avoiding a conflict does not automatically equate to peace. Blowing up and telling someone off or shunning them solves nothing either, but just sweeps the dirt under the rug. Unresolved conflicts and their issues can last for years due to just plain stubbornness, pride, and not having gotten your way. The longer you let things go unresolved the harder it becomes to make peace and it gives the devil opportunity to build the wall of division higher. That’s exactly what Paul meant when he wrote in Ephesians 4:26-27, “If you are angry, don’t sin by nursing your grudge. Don’t let the sun go down with you still angry – get over it quickly; for when you are angry you give a mighty foothold to the devil.” (The Living Bible) “Discovering Jesus in everyday life” is the theme of my blog. This is the first time I couldn’t come up with a more positive uplifting analogy, because He never acted in the way I just described above. You might say, “Oh yeah, didn’t Jesus call the Pharisees hypocrites, fools, snakes, blind guides and sons of hell?” He did indeed because He spoke the truth, but like so many today, they just didn’t want to hear or see that about themselves. “Well, didn’t He get angry and upset the tables of the money changers in the temple driving them out with a whip? What about that?” Yes, again He did, but His anger was righteous without sin not vengeful and self-centered. Many people have a one-sided template of Jesus. He’s always loving, kind, gentle and never confrontational. However, the moment you speak a word of truth that applies to them and steps on their toes, they lash out and act completely opposite, just like the Pharisees. So, on their part it’s “My way or the highway”, and they never stop to consider that their way may not be God’s way. How easy it is for some to write off a long friendship or relationship and cast it aside like a cheap pair of Chinese shoes, rather than repair it, recognizing its value past, present, and future.

. . . Wear It.